Prijateljstvo meĂ°u ženama:

Jednu noć supruga nije došla kući i suprug ju je upitao gde je spavala a ona mu odgovori da je spavala kod jedne svoje prijateljice.
Suprug je nazvao deset njenih najboljih prijateljica ali nijedna od njih to nije potvrdila

Prijateljstvo meĂ°u muškarcima:

Jednu noć suprug nije dosao kući i supruga ga je upitala gde je spavao a on joj odgovori da je spavao kod jednog prijatelja.
Supruga je nazvala deset njegovih najboljih prijatelja, osmoro njih je potvrdilo da je spavao kod njih, a dvojica da je on još uvek tamo.



60 things you shouldn’t say to a Serb:

1.What a Serbia?
2.Albania, Serbia, same shit.
3.Nice Mercedes, my car is better.
4.Nikola Tesla was Croatian.
5.Hi, I’m Croatian.
6.We did it to Iraq, we can do it to you.
7.You just a bunch of Russians acting like Greeks.
8.Kosovo should be an independent state.
9.Hi, I’m from Albania.
10.I thought you guys were white people.
11.Where’s Serbia?
12.Is that in Middle East?
13.Stop sleeping in the middle of the day like stoners.
14.I like your grandma’s bandada, what clique she roll wit’ homie.
15.The music sounds Arab to me.
16.This Turkish coffee tastes like shit.
17.Hell yea I was staring at your daughter…
18.Your wife too.
19.What do you mean I have to buy you guys drinks for my birthday.
20.Stop drinking all my liquor, you got kids to drive back home.
21.It’s 12:30 am and you wanna throw a party?
22.You guys dance a lot like Jewish people at weddings?
23.I’m more wasted than you.
24.You wanna whoop my ass because all the girls are coming on to me?
25.Your son said he was Italian?
26.Why do I have to pay for gas, it’s your car.
27.Stop talking in that funny language.
28.The place you dance and get drunk in is connected whit your church?!?!
29.You got some bushy eyebrows.
30.It’s almost a unibrow.
31.Your guys are lovely singers when you’re all drunk.
32.Chose your shirt up dude, no one needs to look at your hairy chest.
33.You wear too much cologne.
34.The UN keeps world peace.
35.Your son is gay.
36.Damn look at that girl she is fine, oh that’s your sister?
37.You did not build that hous by yourself, ok.
38.Wait, why is there a picture of you when you were little smoking a cigarette?
39.The US takes care of your ass over there.
40.I saw your daughter with an Albanian.
41.Wow, so do you like, speak Siberian???
42.It’s 4:00 am and you’re getting drunk at the church hall?
43.That singer looks like a porn star, is she famous?
44.What kind of name is Ceca?!
45.“Thomas Edison…blah, blah, blah”
46.That dudes party was way better than yours.
47.Can you teach me how to swear, oh please, pretty please?... (5min. later walking down in public: “kurva, *****, **** se…”)
48.Wow, heavy accent.
49.You look Mexican from a distance.
50.…and from up close.
51.That so weird why do you celebrate Christmas later than us.
52.Those poor Bosnians…
53.Can you please play some music in English?
54.In health I learned that if you have more than one drink a night you’re an alcoholic.
55.You’re from Siberia?
56.What does â€â€™sawmo slohgah srebinah spasawvaw’’ mean?
57.Say something in Yugoslavian.
58. Oh yeah, you speak Serbo-Croatian!
59.The Italian Mafia is better than the Serb Mafia.
60.Wow your alcohol is way too strong for me.

Znaci neweraaa...madafaking 60 stwari.................ahhahahahahaahahahahahhaahah

hahahahhaa

Davi se mlada dama u besnim talasima. Dotrcava lep, visok Francuz, skace u more, pliva, pliva, pliva, pliva, dode na 2 metra od devojke i udavi se. Za njim dotrcava Nemac, visok, lep, snažan, sav u mišicima, skace u more, pliva, pliva, pliva, pliva, pliva, dode samo 1 metar od devojke i udavi se. Evo i Engleza, gromada od coveka, kao od brega odvaljen, visok 2 metra, skace u more, pliva, pliva, pliva, pliva, pliva, pliva, taman što je dotakao devojku, ali i on se udavi. Dolazi Srbin, naš Milojko, sav zakržljao, sa pilecim grudima, krivim nogama, ružan k'o davo, skoci u more i odmah se udavi.

Mali debil pošao u školu i ceka autobus na stanici. Autobus dolazi.
• Tani autobut! - vikne on, ali vozac doda gas i ode.
Sledeceg dana ponovi se isto. Dva dana kasnije mali debil se doseti i istrci ispred autobusa:
• Tani autobut!!!
Vozac doda gas i pregazi ga. Policajci zaustave vozaca i pitaju ga zašto nije kocio kad je video decaka na ulici, a on ce:
• Ta on tu meni tvaki dan: Tani autobut?!

Prolazi covek pored zgrade i vidi retardiranog momka u invalidskim kolicima kako bezuspešno pruža ruku prema zvonu na interfonu. Covek pride momku i ponudi mu svoju pomoc, a ovaj ce:
• Zvoonooo, eee, zzvonoo!
Covek ga pita da li da pozvoni, a ovaj kaže:
• Da, daa, ddaaa, zzvoonooo!
Pošto je pozvonio, covek ga upita šta sada da radi, a momak mu odgovori:
• Beežimmooo!

Došla Smrt po babu, a baba ne zna šta ce, pa otrci u vrtic i sedne sa decom da jede. Dode Smrt pa je potapše po ramenu:
• Šta radiš?
A ona ce njemu:
• Evo jucam...
• 'Ajde, jucaj pa cemo papa.

Dosao mujo u prodavnicu televizora i pita jel imate u boji televizor?
Imamo.
Dajte mi crveni.

 Sede dve devojcice na klupi u parku, kad pridje im pedofil...
Ponudi on njih bombonom i one se zahvale. Dodje on drugi dan pa da devojcicama lizalicu... Dodje on tako i treci dan pa da devojcicama cokoladu... Kad kaze jedna devojcica:
- Jebo te, dobicemo secernu bolest dok nas ovaj ne pojebe!

  ... (w8ing mikijev komentar )

Dosao DedA Mraz u dom za retardiranu decu, pa kaze: -
"Ko bude otpevao malu pesmu dobice mali poklon, a ko veliku veliki poklon.
" Dodje jedna mala i pocne vikati: - "AUAUAUAU",
a deda kaze: - "Ko se bude zajebavao nece dobiti nista

 Sede dve devojcice na klupi u parku, kad pridje im pedofil...
Ponudi on njih bombonom i one se zahvale. Dodje on drugi dan pa da devojcicama lizalicu... Dodje on tako i treci dan pa da devojcicama cokoladu... Kad kaze jedna devojcica:
- Jebo te, dobicemo secernu bolest dok nas ovaj ne pojebe!

Sine, ne ljuljaj babu, nije se zato obesila.

Kako Saša Matic kuca smajli?
-)

Prijateljstvo među ženama:

Jednu noć supruga nije došla kući i suprug ju je upitao gde je spavala a ona mu odgovori da je spavala kod jedne svoje prijateljice.
Suprug je nazvao deset njenih najboljih prijateljica ali nijedna od njih to nije potvrdila

Prijateljstvo među muškarcima:

Jednu noć suprug nije dosao kući i supruga ga je upitala gde je spavao a on joj odgovori da je spavao kod jednog prijatelja.
Supruga je nazvala deset njegovih najboljih prijatelja, osmoro njih je potvrdilo da je spavao kod njih, a dvojica da je on još uvek tamo.



60 things you shouldn’t say to a Serb:

1.What a Serbia?
2.Albania, Serbia, same shit.
3.Nice Mercedes, my car is better.
4.Nikola Tesla was Croatian.
5.Hi, I’m Croatian.
6.We did it to Iraq, we can do it to you.
7.You just a bunch of Russians acting like Greeks.
8.Kosovo should be an independent state.
9.Hi, I’m from Albania.
10.I thought you guys were white people.
11.Where’s Serbia?
12.Is that in Middle East?
13.Stop sleeping in the middle of the day like stoners.
14.I like your grandma’s bandada, what clique she roll wit’ homie.
15.The music sounds Arab to me.
16.This Turkish coffee tastes like shit.
17.Hell yea I was staring at your daughter…
18.Your wife too.
19.What do you mean I have to buy you guys drinks for my birthday.
20.Stop drinking all my liquor, you got kids to drive back home.
21.It’s 12:30 am and you wanna throw a party?
22.You guys dance a lot like Jewish people at weddings?
23.I’m more wasted than you.
24.You wanna whoop my ass because all the girls are coming on to me?
25.Your son said he was Italian?
26.Why do I have to pay for gas, it’s your car.
27.Stop talking in that funny language.
28.The place you dance and get drunk in is connected whit your church?!?!
29.You got some bushy eyebrows.
30.It’s almost a unibrow.
31.Your guys are lovely singers when you’re all drunk.
32.Chose your shirt up dude, no one needs to look at your hairy chest.
33.You wear too much cologne.
34.The UN keeps world peace.
35.Your son is gay.
36.Damn look at that girl she is fine, oh that’s your sister?
37.You did not build that hous by yourself, ok.
38.Wait, why is there a picture of you when you were little smoking a cigarette?
39.The US takes care of your ass over there.
40.I saw your daughter with an Albanian.
41.Wow, so do you like, speak Siberian???
42.It’s 4:00 am and you’re getting drunk at the church hall?
43.That singer looks like a porn star, is she famous?
44.What kind of name is Ceca?!
45.“Thomas Edison…blah, blah, blah”
46.That dudes party was way better than yours.
47.Can you teach me how to swear, oh please, pretty please?... (5min. later walking down in public: “kurva, *****, **** se…”)
48.Wow, heavy accent.
49.You look Mexican from a distance.
50.…and from up close.
51.That so weird why do you celebrate Christmas later than us.
52.Those poor Bosnians…
53.Can you please play some music in English?
54.In health I learned that if you have more than one drink a night you’re an alcoholic.
55.You’re from Siberia?
56.What does â€â€™sawmo slohgah srebinah spasawvaw’’ mean?
57.Say something in Yugoslavian.
58. Oh yeah, you speak Serbo-Croatian!
59.The Italian Mafia is better than the Serb Mafia.
60.Wow your alcohol is way too strong for me.

хахахахха јооооооој 

Voz "klopara" kroz Srbiju. Kondukter proverava karte putnicima i dolazi do jednog klinca, koji putuje sam.
• Dečko, pokaži kartu!
• Ja sam Srbin.
• Ma imaš li ti kartu, momak?
• Ali, ja sam Srbin!
Na sledećoj stanici kondukter izbaci klinca napolje.Kada je voz došao na krajnje odredište, kondukter šeta po vozu i proverava da li su svi izašli, a prilazi mu mašinovoĂ°a:
• Kolega, znaš li gde mi je sin?
• Auuu… Srbo, brate, - izvini!

 

Hhahahahahhaah...

Najzad neki svez i dobar vic

ahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Dobar!

Voz "klopara" kroz Srbiju. Kondukter proverava karte putnicima i dolazi do jednog klinca, koji putuje sam.
• Dečko, pokaži kartu!
• Ja sam Srbin.
• Ma imaš li ti kartu, momak?
• Ali, ja sam Srbin!
Na sledećoj stanici kondukter izbaci klinca napolje.Kada je voz došao na krajnje odredište, kondukter šeta po vozu i proverava da li su svi izašli, a prilazi mu mašinovoĂ°a:
• Kolega, znaš li gde mi je sin?
• Auuu… Srbo, brate, - izvini!

 

znachi solarijum a? Znachi ti si metroseksualac-ciga,nesto kao dzej i keba? ULTIMATE-HATE-ODJAVA-HATE-NA-LOKIJA-MICKEY=>NEXT

hm...solarijum... dugo sam razmisljao zato cigani idu u solarijum i napokon skontao... pa da bi jos vise pocrneli i da ih ljudi vise ne zovu cigani nego CRNCI!!! ULTIMATE-EXPANSION-GIPSY-HATE-TORQUE-COUNTDOWN...3...2...1...YOU FUCKING FAIL!!! ***OVER AND OUT***

hhhhhhh KAKO STE ME PROVALILI .. DADA TO JE!!!!!!111onenine

znachi solarijum a? Znachi ti si metroseksualac-ciga,nesto kao dzej i keba? ULTIMATE-HATE-ODJAVA-HATE-NA-LOKIJA-MICKEY=>NEXT

hm...solarijum... dugo sam razmisljao zato cigani idu u solarijum i napokon skontao... pa da bi jos vise pocrneli i da ih ljudi vise ne zovu cigani nego CRNCI!!! ULTIMATE-EXPANSION-GIPSY-HATE-TORQUE-COUNTDOWN...3...2...1...YOU FUCKING FAIL!!! ***OVER AND OUT***

Bili su 2 brata,1 ga zgazio kamion drugi je vozio kamiona